But they only know what I told them, and I haven't even told them the worst of it. True I was a slave, and a criminal and did my things to survive but those are vague details. Can they really accept me after we start doing work together or if we get a job from manages to connect the dots and figure out what I really did, not just indirectly because of my slicing but what I am really guilty of first hand.

The though of what would happen to her if they found out about her kept bothering Link less then what would they do, what would Yaoksi do if he found out or more likely when. Better yet what would happen to Yaoksi if someone came after her. It kept eating at her, if Yaoksi and her on being partners then odd are he would find out eventually and for all he had done for her the very least he deserved was to hear the truth from her not from some thug with a blaster.

She got up and left the galley not even excusing herself and headed to the cockpit. She walked in and saw Galen sitting in front of the comm station with Yaoksi standing by. She crept behind Galen to where Yaoksi stood.

“Yaoksi,” Whispered Link. “Can I talk to you when I get the chance, alone? It's kind of important so whenever you have time I'll be in my quarters.”

Link didn't wait for Yaoksi to respond in case he was needed by Galen and just left him there and headed to her quarters, the room was still bear of anything minus one wall locker and a rack built into her bulk head. She made a mental note to see about alterations at the first chance she got, if she was still here after her conversation with Yaoksi.

--------------------

It was answered fairly quickly, too, which impressed me even more.

So I just kept my big yap shut, giving Galen's shoulder a "go-ahead" kind of squeeze, and was just hanging there waiting to see how she decided to respond to this Seus person, when Link's soft voice whispered behind me.

I jumped a little then turned around, but she was already heading away.

"You can take it from here, Mrs. Danner," I said formally, nodding to Galen when she swiveled in her seat to look up at me. "I think you've gotten things pretty much under control; just keep me in the loop, ok?"

With another nod and a final pat on her shoulder I departed, following after Link as she padded quickly off into the depths of the ship. I caught the tip of her tail as she disappeared into a room, the door whooshing shut in her wake.

What else to do, but knock politely.

"Link?" I called out, keeping my voice neutral even though my heart was suddenly beginning to thump. There was a certain quality to that whispered little voice of hers that set my gut to churning; what was wrong now?

I voiced my concern aloud, and knocked again on the door.

--------------------

Then I squashed them, and busied myself with a reply.

"It is good to find you well too," I typed quickly, wishing the man had given me more in the way of something to fix upon in my reply. But that was Seus: always the cautious one, the slick one, the one to find out things without letting anything run loose from his lips in turn.

I pondered a moment longer, wondering if we ought to adhere to the decorum my request obviously demanded, and request permission to come personally to the Guild World. But that would only delay us in what we needed to do, in getting to where we needed to go; shrugging my shoulders, I continued.

"Regarding said individual mentioned earlier; I am currently engaged in -- " I paused, now wondering just how much to reveal. Chances were probably something like two hundred percent Seus already had a handle on Sorben's career change; holding back from him now wouldn't do anything but foster distrust between us.

"--hunting for him. He has been missing for some time now. My companions and I are trying to determine what has happened to him; meanwhile, we have a jedi who has gone rogue on us, one who is most likely planning on doing everything in his power to stop us, or at least use diversion tactics to delay us in our progress.""

That was more than likely true enough.

"As a personal favor, and for old time's sake, would you set a Hunter out after this guy? We don't want him hit, just... detained. His name is Erik Kartan, and his last known location was--"

I followed up with a string of coordinates.

"We're not certain where he has gone off too, exactly, but it shouldn't be too difficult for your men to find him. Here's the ship he was in, the last we knew...."

Now I followed up with a list of detailed specs regarding Erik's purloined vessel.

"Seus, this would go a long way toward helping us locate our mutual acquaintance. I would seriously owe you one--"

Nevermind that we already did; well, at least Sorben did, in my eyes.

"--and we can pay you--"

A pause. Followed by a gulp.

"Anything you want.

"Over."

My fingers flew over the communications console as I scrambled the message, then punched send and let it go winging on its way.

((OOC: Message is sent into When It Rains, It Pours in the "CSWU" forums, thank you.))

[ 03-04-2010 11:38 AM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Galen ]

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"My dear, consider it done. And as for payment..."

A small hesitation.

"I will send a bill when you are duly satisfied with our performance in this matter. I trust I can send a return message to this same frequency?

"Good. You can expect to hear from us sometime in the near future.

"Good-by, my dear. I look forward to our future chat.

"Out."

--------------------

That was quick of him.

She sat there for a minute thinking what she was going to say, maybe she should back out of it. No that would have make Yaoksi push it out of her later. Or she could lie about it, no Yaoksi was the one person Link could never lie to, not after what they went through. Zoning out the second knock on her door awakened her from her own internal argument. Quickly she got up and opened the door.

“Come on in,” Link said. She hurried back over to her bunk and sat on the edge and Yaoksi sat beside her. For yet another minute she sat in silence staring at the floor until she looked up into his face and saw his concern.

“I told you about my past earlier,” continued Link. “Well some of it I left out a lot of details but most of those aren't important except for one. At first I thought I could hide it and never deal with it again, but you would find out eventually and I would rather you hate me now then for you to find out later on and hate me then.”

“When I was a slave I had 3 different masters, this happened under the last one about 3 years ago. It was a bothan family who were minor politicians in the corporate sector. Him, his wife, and his 4 year old daughter. He bought me as an 'exotic pet' for his daughter. It by far was my worse experience as a slave, living in a small cage, eating from a bowl of food on the ground, preforming tricks for the amusement of their little girl. It was a hell that would have destroyed me if I stayed there and almost did.”

Links fist where clenched and shaking, she was angry at bringing up those particular memories, but she calmed herself down so she could continue.

“I almost gave up hope when I saw by chance the access code for the security system entered by the wife one day. I knew if I where to escape it would have to be that night. Later when the girl was asleep I used a data terminal in her room using the access code to clear a path out and was about to leave when she woke up. She started crying and I knew I would have to silence her or else I would never escape. So I grabbed her pillow and held her to the bed with it so she would stop.”

Link looked away from Yaoksi back to the floor.

“And in a few minutes she stopped, I just wanted her to be quiet I didn't mean to stop her from breathing, so I had a choice. I could either escape and leave her to die or wake her parents and have them save her, You can guess which choice I made, I found out later in the first of my many bounties that she did die and there was a bounty for me dead.”

“I know that because of things I've done while slicing that people have died, but it was always someone else doing it or the people where corrupt any ways so they deserved it. She was 4 and didn't know any better and I did, I killed her because it would have made my life better I killed a child I am a monster.”

Link buried her face into her mechanical hand screaming.

“I'm a monster aren't I Yaoksi? I killed a little girl, and would probably do it again if I was given another chance. I'm a monster, Yaoksi? What am I Yaoksi?”

--------------------

Truth was, I needed time to think, time to look at this from all angles, time to really address every iota of what Link was blurting out to me, both in word and raw emotion and body language. But slamming home right on top of that thought was the realization that I didn't have that time, Link needed me now. I knew she wasn't stupid; any attempt to hide my feelings on the matter would be quickly pounced upon.

I didn't want to hurt her; Fate's knew she'd been hurt too often in her tragic little life.

Slowly I stood up, walked away a bit to come to a halt in front of a small picture hanging on the bulkhead of her rather spartan quarters. It was an image of the Kht'arran Nebula, in all it's magenta and ultraviolet glory. I stared at it, letting my mind just go free, and suddenly -- albeit with some effort -- I managed to look at everything with relatively new eyes.

Everything.

"Link," I began carefully, still facing the image. "There are times in our lives when circumstances move so far beyond our control that there is simply nothing we can do but follow along in the flow of them. Then at times what can be considered life-changing events happen in a way that we can react in different ways; these are the events by which we are measured, which truly define us, where our true hearts and souls are revealed."

I paused a moment, trying to figure out how to speak the feelings that were now running through me, feelings that I was having great difficulty translating into words. It seemed that anything I could manage would sound dated, or stupid, or shallow, or at worst, mundane. But for Link's sake, I had to try.

I turned around, came up to her and knelt down on the floor. From that position I was on eye-to-eye level with her; now I reached out and placed both hands on her shoulders.

"The first circumstances I mentioned are-- are-- well, almost the vagaries of Fate. No matter what we try, nothing can stop the way things are happening. The path you had to take was set before you the moment those beings defined you as less than intelligent, as less than a peer simply because of the way your species is physically put together. They did not bother to see that which you are, only that which they deemed you to be.

"This is the sort of thing that history presents to us, unfortunately too many times, as a major reason for war. And every war has its... collateral damages."

I stopped, searching deeply into her eyes.

"Link," I said softly. "I really think that had you chosen to awaken the parents, it was already too late to save their child. Otherwise she would have still been breathing when you -- stopped your actions. You had to do what you had to do, for the sake of your own sanity and self-preservation. I don't believe what you said to me; I don't think you'd do this again. If that were true, this wouldn't be bothering you now as badly as it is.

"You're not a monster, Link. I'll never think of you in that way, ever."

I started to get up, then noticed something dark and shadowy lurking in the depths of her eyes. Settling back on my knees, I made a final addendum.

"I know you saw my initial reaction to what you said. Please don't misread it. Yes I am horrified by this. But, what is horrifying is that you had to live your way through it. No one deserves to be placed in the position you were; this was not of your choice."

Not knowing what else to say, I just gathered her up into the biggest bear hug that I could. Suddenly my own vision was blurred; closing my eyes, I tried to quietly sniff away the sudden tears that had formed in them, doing my best to be as quiet about it as I could so as not to distress the little gal any further.

[ 03-23-2010 01:36 PM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Yaoksi Joao ]

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“I don't know what to do,” whimpered Link. “All I ever have done to ease the pain is run. Whenever I try to confront my past or try to stop and do something to make my life better it makes it worse. Thats why I'm scarred. I'm scarred to death Yaoksi.”

Link worked herself out of Yaoksi's grasp and stood with her back to him facing the locker next to her rack. Rearing back she punched the door of the locker with as much force as she could muster in her state with her mechanical arm. She felt nothing of the blow except at her shoulder where flesh met metal. Her legs buckled and she sank to her knees resting her head against the dented door.

“I want to run Yaoksi, from this situation, this place, and even you because I'm scarred if I try to work it out things will only get worse. But I'm more afraid of what would happen to me without you, I don't know if I can survive without you.”

Link rolled over resting her back against the door facing Yaoksi with her legs sprawled out in front of her.

“What do you do when a given to choices that are both painful, only one hurts more then the other? Or when no matter what outcome to a choice is, those who everyone would view as good would condemn you for it? I wish I could start over as some one else and not be the orphan, the slave, the slicer. But do something that other people would look at and say look at what she did, I wish I could be like her.”

[ 03-24-2010 01:06 AM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Cel ]

--------------------

I paused to collect my thoughts, eyeing the hole she had just punched into the bulkhead. An obstinate grin tried involuntarily to creep across my face; damn, but the lil' gal had something here that at some point in the future might actually prove useful.

My eyes returned to her, and I went on.

"Your past is your past, it has already happened and there are only two things you can do about it now. You can either run from it, or stand up to it in acceptance and learn from it."

I ran a hand down my face, drawing in a deep breath while considering how to continue from here. Damn, but all I had managed to say at this point sounded like the mouthings of some smug jedi or something; I knew she needed more. And suddenly it came to me what I think she needed to hear.

"Link," I said earnestly, reaching to to take up her mechanical hand in my own. "You have just got to quit seeing yourself as how you think other people see you. You just gotta quit that, Kid; there is too much of who you are and what you know to waste time in something as self-defeating as that. And who are you, you might ask?

"You are a beautiful person, with skills many others would envy. You are highly adaptable, creative, intelligent, clever, pretty, and compassionate to others. I don't know many other peeps in the galaxy who have quite the set of innate characteristics that you do; that's one of the reasons I asked you to partner up with me. I wish you could have met some of the peeps in my past; I don't partner up easily. Only had one other partner, K'kihl; usually I'm a loner myself.

"Anyway, stop building up this image of what you think others think. What matters is how you truly view yourself. Think of all you've been through; most peeps would have just given up in defeat over and over again, but not you. You kept on; you're strong, Link. Stronger than you think. Strong enough, I really believe, to find it within you to search deep within yourself and discover just who you are. You're not a mirror, Link; you're an individual. And now you do have a choice. You can choose to continue on looking at yourself through the eyes of everybody else, or you can be yourself, let me help you find yourself, and keep a steady course with me."

I saw something rising up in her eyes, something trying to "but, but..." me; raising a hand I then reached out and placed a light finger against her lips, squelching whatever words she had been thinking of saying.

"About that child..." Her eyes clouded with pain at the mention of this; I gave her a determined look and went on. "Yes, the action was a horrible one. But it is one you have already faced, Link, and because of what you are saying right now is obviously one you have accepted responsibility for. That is a mature step forward, sweetie, believe me, a hard, hard thing to do. And what are we going to do about it?"

I sat back on my heels, now placing my hands on my thighs.

"We're going to continue on, but be on the lookout for hunters being sent in your direction. Maybe Galen can talk to Seus, explain the situation, have the hunter pull back a bit for the time being. The right thing to do would be to go to the authorities about this, but personally I wouldn't trust the local judicial system of a planet that would see you as simply a pet. Seems to me they're just sending that hunter out after you like we would hotfoot after a rogue nek or something; they don't want to bring you to trial, but kill you like an animal. Which you most certainly are not.

"So, until the galaxy is finally settled down and we can get you to justice that truly stands for justice and equality for all, we follow the road we're on and do the best we can."

It suddenly struck me that this indeed was what we were striving for, no matter what kind of wrapping the situation was hidden behind. Justice and equality for all.

It wasn't going to be easy.

"I won't be easy," I spoke the thought aloud, looking her straight in the eye. "And I sure as hell need you, the real you, to help me get through it."

I began to get to my feet, but once again paused as a final thought struck me.

"Link, your past is a short one, relatively speaking. You have an entire future ahead of you, a future where a helluva lot can happen to change your life. If we're right about what is going on, about what we have to do--" I waved a hand in general explanation of the situation our little party was in "--and if we're successful, well...

"You're going to have the entire damned Galaxy looking at you saying, "Look what she did. I wish I could be like her."

[ 03-24-2010 10:11 AM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Yaoksi Joao ]

--------------------

Link could see Yaoksi about to jump in with a retort and silenced him with a little move he just pulled a moment before by lightly placing a finger on his lips.

“But then I was alone before and now you are here. Perhaps that will be all the difference, I'm willing to give it a try if you help me through it.”

Link leaned back against the locker and drew her blaster, twirling it around her trigger finger. Lightly she tossed it in the air and caught it back on her trigger finger. Quickly Link reversed the direction of the spin and brought the pistol back into its holster.

“So what now, I wasn't an idiot when it came to the bounty hunters. Every one thinks the ryn who killed the girl is dead anyways and no one besides you, Terrin, Galen, and the Jedi know I was a slave. I just knew that eventually different information would come out and I know you would have pieced it together, I wanted it to come from me. And my past isn't as short as you think, I maybe 14 almost 15 I think, but thats about the equivalent of 17 for a human.”

Link snaked her tail abound Yaoksi's hand holding it tight. She noticed that for once Yaoksi didn't jump at her action which bought a little grin to her face.

“Just one thing, don't tell the others. I don't know if I'll ever be able to let everyone know what I did or if I can trust them with this. But I know I can trust you.”

--------------------

"You got it, Kid."

It did wonders to my heart to hear the last words she spoke; images of how she was when she first came into my life, all defensive and full of distrust, flashed through my head. Then by sticking with us she was thrust into situations that would horrify anybody, and suffered terrible injury to herself in the process.

Yet here she finally seemed to be letting her guard down, really letting it down. At last.

As I said, it did my heart good; I hope the smile I was giving her wasn't too sappy.

"Let's go see what Mrs. Danner has come up with," I said, cutting into the warmth of the moment. Neither Link nor I, after all, were really the "warm fuzzy" type; what needed to be expressed had neatly been done so, and now we could continue on with our even more tightly joined lives.

Being careful not to loosen her grasp, I got to my feet, letting my arm hang down so her tail wouldn't have to stretch uncomfortably.

"C'mon, Kiddo," I reiterated, and headed out, Link trotting along at my side. Entering the command center of my lovely new ship, we made a beeline to where we had left Galen. She turned from the boards, a quirking brow indicating mild curiosity at our entrance.

Nothing of what Link and I had shared was to be said, of course. I merely gestured with my free hand.

"Anything?" I asked succinctly.

[ 03-26-2010 09:31 AM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Yaoksi Joao ]

--------------------

Figuring whatever had happened between them was really none of my business, I leaned back in the seat, cocking one ankle across my knee and wiggling my booted foot.

"I've reached Seus. He's sending a Hunter out after Kartan, with the promise that the job isn't a lethal one. I hope he can find the man; there's too much we need to get done to have to waste time worrying about what he's doing out there.

"He'll let us know when he's gotten him pinned. In the meantime, we're still on our original course, and all systems are nominal. Unless you think I should stay here and babysit, I think we should go back to the others and see what new developments they might have come up with.

"At least finish eating; I'm still a bit on the peckish side!"

The man merely nodded, replied a general agreement with the suggestion, so after making one final check of the systems I rose from the chair and headed out, Captain Joao and Link keeping steady pace with me. It wasn't long until we had returned to where we left the others, and rejoined tham at the table where we had been sitting.

"What's up?" I asked of no one in particular, gesturing toward the half-full bottle of Antarian carmenere that in our absence had manifested itself upon the table. But there I paused in mid-reach as multiple sets of inquisitive eyes flicked in my direction. I realized that I was expected to fill the silence those eyes dragged with them with something useful; smoothly I put the hand that was reaching for the wine on the table and cast a look about.

"Yes, I've reached the Gulid World, and yes, they're sending a Hunter out after Erik. I've been assured that he will merely be detained when he is found; knowing their capabilities the way I do I think we won't have to worry about Mr. Kartan any longer. But, we're going to owe Seus... er, something."

This last was directed at Terrin. Not opting to elaborate any more than that, I again reached out to the carmenere, poured myself a glass and finally sat down to enjoy its rich, ruby fragrance.

[ 03-31-2010 09:31 AM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Galen ]

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... if you ever get finished with all this, the shoulder devil snorted... either."

Quieting for a moment, Terrin took a sip of his own glass of the carmenere, his eyes defocusing in thought. "You know, we really haven't discussed how we are going to get into the Temple on K'eel Doba undetected, especially since our old standby of using your Sith-flightsuit won't work...or at least, I'm assuming that it won't."

Terrin paused, looking at Galen and arching an eyebrow in question. He chewed his lower lip a bit in consideration. Looking away from her, his next words were clearly addressed to everyone present. "You know, we might have somewhat of an advantage because Sith technology and magick isn't working...

...because we have access to technology that might be able to replicate the cloaking capabilities of the Sith flightsuit so we can traipse about the Temple to look for Tarnus and his armor."

[ 04-06-2010 10:43 PM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Terrin Danner ]

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Just... camouflaged.

The wheels in my head began spinning and I settled back with a faraway look on my puss, my half-finished carmanere hanging loosely in my hand.

Lessee... hmmm. Maybe cameras, something with nano-cams or something, something the wearer can have on him, like some kind of cloth made up of tiny screens or something, bits small enough to move with him or her... then maybe a comped camera unit that took pics of the wearer's surroundings, and played them accordingly on the tiny screens. Now, that might work. The wearer wouldn't be really invisible, but if the screens were tiny enough, and if the distortion of movement could somehow be compensated for, dampened or something, well...

It was the next best thing to it.

I shook my head, snapping myself from my reverie and slugged the rest of my wine.

"I wonder if there's another way into that Temple?" I asked of no one in particular. "Seems to me there ought to be, if only a secreted little tunnel or something. I mean, what if there was war or something? Wouldn't the Head Honchos need some means of sneaking out so their governing body would be preserved?"

But wait. Didn't that already happen, according to what Dad had found? Had any Sith managed to escape? Hell if I knew.

I shook my head, and reached for the bottle again. Back to Square One, as far as I was concerned, so going with my original little brainstorm I spoke it aloud, outlining what had popped into my fevered brain.

"What do you think, Link?" I asked of her as I came to the end of my explanation. "You're the computer guru... well, in the hacking department at least. But in that arena you've certainly had to have learned more about what's out there than the rest of us combined.

"Can this work?"

[ 04-28-2010 03:41 PM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Galen ]

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Making ourselves invisible, no that would never work. Even the smallest of the Empires cloak field generators would have to be powered by something like the main reactor on the Challenger. Camouflage or disguise perhaps, no none of us know enough about their customs to infiltrate the place for long. And don’t they have their Jedi sorcery, and ships, and weapons, no wait… they don’t. If they can’t use sorcery and we have technology then maybe, no that won’t work the y have numbers.

Link was drawing blanks on coming up with ideas, and as she looked around the room it looked like so was everyone else. Except for Kyan, who was staring at a holo of a younger version of him with who appeared to be his daughter. It was weird because from Link’s point of view the face on the holo perfectly lined up with Kyan’s own and made him look like his younger self. Then out of nowhere it hit Link.

“The Idiot’s Array,” Said Link. “In sabbac there are 3 different hands that are considered the best. One that adds up to 23 but your opponent thinks it doesn’t one that doesn’t but he thinks it does, and the Idiot’s array. A 2 card a 3 card and the idiot which is worth 0, so put them together you have 023 the idiot’s version of a perfect sabbac. It’s almost suicide to go for it and to your opponent it looks like you have nothing so they always fall for it. We need to have a reverse idiot’s array, a hand that looks like the idiot’s array, but is impossible, and to bet against it would be tantamount to suicide in case they are wrong.”

“According to everything you said about the Sith, they use their sorcery much like the Vong use biotech, and we use technology. Except they don’t have their sorcery in addition to not having technology, or the skill to understand how it work. We take a couple of repulsors, maybe rig a flame thrower or two, and attach it to Kyan’s armor. Then we use a holo shroud to make him look like any other Jedi wizard, just picture this. They are all powerless cut off from their magik even their leaders, then here comes Kyan the all powerful Grand Jedi Wizard who’s immense power overcame that which stripped away their power and by levitating a few objects, maybe summoning some fire out of thin air, they begin to fear what else he can possible do and give us what we want then we leave as fast as we can.”

[ 04-28-2010 08:22 PM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Cel ]

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It might work.

It just frakkin' might work, sure as there's Treasure on Roon!

"I-- I--" I began, stumbling over a reply as I scrambled to switch gears from the intense thought my brain was focused upon and into simple acknowledgment of an idea so clever and uncomplicated it was genius. It took me a few seconds of this mental tap-dancing, seconds that I filled casting furtive looks about at the others. They looked as surprised as I felt. Finally I secured mental footing, and turned back to Link with a smile.

"That's a super idea, Link!" I said, giving her an enthusiastic nod. "It sure beats any mumbo-jumbo wizardry I was trying to come up with; Occam's Razor, don'tcha know.

A heartbeat passed.

"The simplest solution is usually the best one," I explained for the benefit of the others, "Not to mention that I'm positive we have whatever equipment we'd need to do this. I mean, if Kyan is willing to assist us in this manner, that is--?"

Shutting my yap, I settled down in my seat, twirling the last dregs of my wine about in the glass while I waited to see if anyone else had further input they wanted to give.

--------------------

“We’ll call that one plan B,” said Kyan. “No point in taking it to that extreme when we can ask first and see what happens. In any case rig up a second set of repulsers and another holo shroud if possible for Gal’ya here.”

Kyan saw Galen’s puzzled look on her face, leaning forward he interlocked his fingers and rested them on the table.

“One Jedi Grand Master is one thing,” continued Kyan. “But remember, thevongese could come at any time and the one thing we need that we don’t have is numbers. It’s hard for me to swallow that there is an entire Sith Empire waiting out there. At least the way the Jedi have described the Sith to be heartless darksiders, so I’m willing to concede that if they where heartless darksiders they would have collapsed long ago die to infighting and maybe all we have ever know at large are the extreme of their people. For now without their Forced based technology who knows what happening to their general populace. Instead of threatening them we could try to offer them basic things they would need right now; food synthesizers, power generators, medical supplies. Terrin right now you have a potential to create the greatest trading partners ever since no one knows about their home worlds Eagle Enterprises could benefit greatly from future trade with the Sith.”

Kyan focused back on his holo projector and the image of him with his daughter Prudii.

I’m sorry Prudi’ka that I left and you went off on your own, ever since I found you on that ship when you where a child and took you as my daughter you have always been a stronger and better Mandalorian then me. I know if your daughter is anything like you that she will be fine until I can find her, don’t worry I’ll find Kani’ka and make the Imperial who did this to her find out why Mando’a has 14 different words for stab.

Gently Kyan thumbed the power button on his holo pad and the image flickered away.

Had to be something...

But... wasn't the Force in absentia for the moment? How could I be trained as an apprentice when all things mystical and magickal seemed to be kaput? And then it struck me...

The man's Mandalorian... or at least trained by such. That's not your everyday martial arts, Galen ol' gal!

A fleeting image of just how good my own martial training had served me on the terrible day that Roan attacked me washed through my mind. The Sith were big, and that monster was...

Well, a monster. But maybe, just maybe, the Mandalorians might have something that might stand up to them if necessary. Khaandon alone knew the Sith's capabilites were more than halved by the disappearance of all things magickal.

And maybe this way, too, by presenting ourselves as a united front we might by body language alone be suggesting to the Sith that unity is the way to go in this man's galaxy.

I brought myself out of my thoughts to the discovery that my head was nodding, and had been for some time.

"Sounds good to me," I said simply as I reached out to pour myself some more of the wine. Taking another sip, I settled back into my seat.

"When do we start? We still have some time before we hit Sith space, right Cap'n?"

This latter was directed toward Captain Joao, who merely smiled and nodded. What else could he do; he knew just as much as I did, since I had been given the privilege of setting our course.

I turned back to Kyan. "Maybe there's room in the aft cargo hold for a couple lessons or two," I finished, then took another, smaller sip of wine.

--------------------

“I do not make this offer lightly Gal’ya,” said Kyan. “I cannot simply give a leason here or there on the ways of the Force, how to be a Jedi, or how to fight. All are interwoven within my life balancing each other out as well as complimenting each other. The balance of Force, The 6 Mandalorian Laws, The emotions I carry, the Jedi’s responsibility to control them, the Love of my family, the call of the Living Force. Each must be taught at the same time or without a good base it is very possible to fall to the darkside.”

Kyan let his words hang in the air allowing Galen to process that while he was serious about training her and would not accept and halfhearted attempts.

“I only know one way to properly train you in such things Gal’ya,” said Kyan. “As a Mandalorian teaches their children, so did I teach my daughters Prud’ika and Ale’ika, and my other apprentices as well. So I’ll ask you one last time just to be sure.”

Kyan rose from his seat standing fully in his armor, lightsabers clanging at his waist.

“I Jedi Master Kot’racyn Jetiis’ad, acknowledge your potential and abilities and more importantly the call of the Living Force. Gal’ya no, Galen Danner I offer my this as my vow to train you in the ways of the Living Force to become a Jedi Knight that you may use your powers for the good of the Galaxy and to help its people. What do you say?”

No sooner had that thought crossed my mind when all its attendant implications reared their selective heads. Those being ones based on generalities I had heard here and there in my jaunts about our fair galaxy, generalities on how jedi choose and train their padawans. Of course the details eluded not only yours truly but the majority of the entities inhabiting said galaxy: the Jedi kept quietly to their own. But enough was publically known about what it took to become a Jedi Knight, in particular the level of committment that it took.

Latent abilities be damned...

He couldn't mean that I-- that, I mean me-- that...

Or could he?

Slowly I set down my glass, snapped into instant sobriety by the intensity of the look he was giving me. For some strange reason serendipity chose to interject at that moment in the form of mutual breath-taking by the others: everyone was suddenly silent.

I suddenly felt that I was the center of everyone's focus.

I looked at Terrin. I thought of Darra. I also thought of Jharmeen, of the events that were possibly going on in the galaxy at this very moment, of what we were trying to do in regards to said events.

I wondered just where I could possibly make the greatest impact.

Hell's Seven Circles, but I thought this kind of thing only happened to younglings!

"Just-- just what exactly are you proposing, Kyan? I mean, that I do? I mean, from now on...?" I stammered, even though deep in my gut I felt I knew exactly how he was going to answer.

--------------------

“That is not something I can answer for you Gal’ya,” replied Kyan. “You must decide that for yourself, I cannot tell you what I do not know myself. But I will let you know that you will have to make sacrifices as a Jedi, many times you will wonder if it is all worth it. Even now I’m not sure I can truly say that if I did not become a Jedi if my wife and child would still be alive, but I can tell if I wasn’t a Jedi I never would have met Prudi’ka my daughter.”

That day over 40 years ago I met Prud’ika, a young abandoned girl about to be killed for sport. I didn’t know at the time of her Force sensitivity or how none of the other Jedi didn’t feel her call out and I did. It seems like yesterday how she thought all men were out to kill her but she accepted me. The scars of her past left her unable to communicate properly except through the Force, and without the Force I never would have found her or been able to help heal her.

“We are not the Jedi of old nor can we afford to be,” continued Kyan. “The Jedi of the past told us to become selfless, detached from the world, but there are those of us that believe as I do that we must stay part of this world to embrace our emotions drawing strength from our love of our friends and family. Though the Force the loss of each of them felt more real and still is painful as if it happened moments ago, but through the Force I grew closer to them all then I ever could without it. You have a gift a very rare one indeed and it is for you to decide how best you can use it, just remember the Force lives in all if us and if you listen to it you will never be alone or know if what you are doing is the right thing. Trust in the Force, live in the moment, and the Force is living like you or me listen to what it has to say.”

Kyan released his hand and headed out in to the corridor but stopped at the hatchway.

“Gal’ya, remember what is truly important to you,” said Kyan. “Your heart will tell you what to do and your heart draws strength from those around you, decide how to best use your gift to help the ones you love. When you have your answer, meet me in the cargo bay.”

The one planted on Terrin's face seemed to carry something more with it. But surprisingly enough, he too was maintaining his silence.

You could hear a veritable pin drop.

I placed my hands on my face, rubbed them up and down, thinking. I wasn't certain of the level of committment... no wait, of that I certainly could hazard a good guess. If I agreed, it would be with 100 percent certainty, 200 percent if that was a possibility. That knowledge contronted, I set it aside and thought of many things.

I might be sequestered from Terrin, from Darra for some time. Then again I might not; Kyan alluded that this new type of training incorporated the love of one's family as a basis for focus, or something. But that love didn't exactly mean physical proximity; for all I knew such contact with my husband or daughter might be something that might unravel the weave of what Kyan would be trying to teach me.

At least in the beginning...?

I lowered my hands with a brief sigh. No use in speculating on this, I would only know the facts when I actually came face-to-face with them.

But did I truly want to?

I thought back some more of the incredible events that had dominated my life since that horrible day on that hideous, deserted planet. What I had endured, and worse, what those around me, who loved and cared for me, had endured simply because this nasty canasta or that one was out for blood and decided that hey, double whammy sort of thing, dont'cha know. How would things have differed then, had I a connection to this Force? How could I have helped in certain situations when many innocents had died due to something I was involved in, like the destruction of Ploatius?

I shook my head slightly. This wasn't really anything I could choose, not when I thought about it. Refusing this offer to make myself more than I ever thought I could be, to learn strategies and connections that could be used in the battle I knew in my gut lay ahead of us... well, that would be the height of callous, cold-hearted selfishness.

I cast another look about the table, ending with a long, lingering one I let sink into Terrin's beautiful baby blues.

"I have to," I whispered, hoping he understood. I turned then to Captain Joao.

"Maybe he'll let me out now and again to navigate for you, heh."

Knowing how pitiable that last statement sounded, I rose quickly to my feet, smiled a little, then let it chase me from the galley and to the cargo bay where Kyan, and for all I knew an entirely new future, awaited me.
I found him kneeling there silently, but somehow I could sense him smiling.

I paused in the door.

"I'm ready," I said simply, surprising myself with the sudden realization that indeed, I meant every tiny bit of that little two-word statement.

[ 05-20-2010 11:03 AM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Galen ]

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There is no such thing as coincidence, just the Living Force acting in its own way.

“I can see you are ready,” Said Kyan. “That is clear from your eyes, but in them I also see fear. Fear ran unchecked can lead you down a very dark path as a Jedi. As a Jedi you cannot let your emotions control you, yet you must not deny yourself from emotions as well. Fear can be beneficial as well it keeps us from making overly reckless decisions, keeps us cautious, and keeps us from risking the lives of others. So in a way all emotions are useful when applied correctly that is one of the basic tenants of the Living Force, in Jedi those of us who believe in the Living Force see the Force as a Living entity one who lends us its strength and will tell us the right thing to do if we listen, and we listen if we listen to our hearts, but enough on the philosophy of the Force for now. Galen bow your head.”
Kyan waited until Galen lowered her head before he stood and placed both of his hand on her head.

“ Ni kar'tayl gai sa'ad Galen,” said Kyan. “I know your name Galen, as my apprentice.”

And daughter… I can only teach in the Mando fashion as one teaches his children. Hopefully one day she will realize the importance of this vow and what she now means not only to the Jedi, but to me as well.

Kyan removed his hands from Galen’s head and offered them to Galen to help her stand.

...and all the while her strong character and strength turning his once shallow self inside out. She was special, of that Terrin was certain. How clearly he remembered the day that they were trapped by Graysith in the Temple, seemingly doomed, when something burst forth from Galen to knock her sister head over hiney. Galen attributed this to Darra, whom she was carrying at the time...

...but to this day he believed it was something more, something from within Galen herself.

Pursing his lips, his blue eyes deepening, Terrin mentally cursed himself for not having said so much as a word to Galen as she left to meet with Kyan to accept his offer. He was keenly aware of the implications of training as a Jedi carried...

...seperation for potentially long lengths of time, the dangers she might face....

...but he also believed in his heart that Galen truly needed this, for herself. And with her strength and potential, Terrin knew what potential Kyan saw shining within.

And at the moment, nothing seemed more important than letting Galen know he was going to support her completely. So, quietly excusing himself from the table, uncertain of the procedures and hoping not to intrude or do something against Kyan's training protocol, Terrin followed Galen's steps towards the cargo bay...

...and halted just beyond the doors, yet stil in sight, as he heard Kyan welcoming Galen to the Jedi order, not wanting to intrude...

...but wanting Galen to know that aside from supporting her in this, that he firmly believed in her and how very truly special he felt she was.

[ 05-24-2010 08:28 PM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Terrin Danner ]

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Dad.

Sorben.

Darra.

Loban, if ever so briefly.

Terrin, the men he employed who so willingly stuck their necks out for something that at the moment we could only take on suspicion... and faith.

K'kihl, without whom I might not even be where I was at this time in my life.

And yes... even Sissy.

Sissy... with her strange power and the even stranger way that over the past several years she had so suddenly changed in personality, in her worldview. I couldn't help but wonder again just what exactly it was that she had command of; well, when things were working right in the universe, that is. I wondered if it had anything to do with this "Living Force" or not, whether it was an offshoot of it, or if it was the other way around.

But sure as there's Treasure on Roon I was going to find out.

I raised my head, stared Kyan straight in the face. Then off to the side a slight movement caught my eye:

Terrin.

I swallowed, suddenly feeling that I was tottering on the apex of some Huge Nexus, a position that if right now I stepped this way I could run back to him, hold him tight, and know everything was going to be all right. Or dismissing all the sunshine and lollipops, at least hope things were going to be all right.

Or I could stay the course, and drawing upon the love I felt for him, and for Darra, and all the others, and using this as Kyan indicated maybe actually do something real.

I stared him straight in the baby blues, knowing the cut had to be made here. I knew Kyan didn't want me to withdraw from love... but still I was positive there were certain sacrifices I would have to make. And so, deliberately turning my focus away from Terrin and fully back to Kyan, I rose slowly to my feet. Unwilling or unable to avert my gaze, I stared him straight in the face too.

"Um-- thank you, my Master," I rejoined, stumbling over words which at their very heart were so atypical of me, all the while using every bit of strength I possessed to not let my gaze fall back into Terrin's again.

As I said, the cut had to be made here.

[ 06-02-2010 12:26 PM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Galen ]

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She does not yet understand my words, and she never shall. I can only show her the Force and how to listen the rest is up to her to determine how to best listen to its wisdom and how to live her life.

Kyan started to remove his armor setting it neatly in a pile along one of the bulkheads of the wall.

“Very well then,” stated Kyan. “I may be A Jedi Master, but I am also Mando’a. I care little for titles, ceremonies, and traditions Gal’ika. As such I ask that you do not call me master, Kyan will do fine, Kyan’buir is a close Mando’a translation. I will teach you what I know of the Force, but ultimately it is the Force itself that is your teacher. Right now I am limited in what I can teach with both of us cut off from directly accessing the Force, but even as we are there is much I can teach you.”

Removing his armored boots as well Kyan placed them next to his armor along with his lightsabers. Grasping the hem of his Jedi robes he tore a loose a 3 inch wide strip of cloth. Returning to the center of the room Kyan grasped the strip of cloth in his hand staring back at Galen.

“Combat,” said Kyan. “While as a Jedi you must strive to avoid it whenever possible you must also know whenever it is nessecary and be ever ready for it Gal’ika.”

Taking the strip of cloth in both of his hands, Kyan draped it across his eyes and tied the tails behind his head blindfolding himself. Slowly using a very fluid motion Kyan took half a step forward with his left foot, keeping his knees slightly bent and feet about a shoulder length apart. His left hand reached across his body as is to draw a nonexistent saber, his right hand hanging loosely as his side.