…and then to who he was.

From nowhere tears sprang into her eyes, blurring her vision; grimacing, she raised a hand and swiped her cheeks angrily, averting her face to gaze at the nearest bulkhead that no one would see her outburst. For quite suddenly she realized that what she was now feeling was not for the sake of those thousands dead, but for herself.

I called him my Sire. I loved him as that. How could I have misjudged him so badly? How could I have not seen something? Anything—the tiniest clue to indicate his true personality, his schemes, his deviousness. Was I too blinded by the power, too much in awe of that which he gave me?

A title and a power.

And for this, to follow him unthinking, blindly, unable to see him as anything other than my Sire and the he who bestowed of the All upon me…

Little by little she approached the bulkhead, unseeing, and at length was up against it. She let her forehead fall against it as a shudder raked her slight frame.

Who am I, to believe this?

“I called him my Sire, I brought him here to this time--“ was all she could muster aloud before falling silent again before a fresh onslaught of grief.

--------------------

“My lady,” he said, standing close behind her. He placed his hands upon her shoulders and gently caressed them. He spoke softly yet clearly. “I believe everything happens for a reason, take no blame for the actions of others. It grieves me to feel the hurt you suffer, to cry out at those who would use you to their own ends. But know this, for as much hurt as they have caused, as much cold hearted anguish they have laid upon you, there are those who truly love you and will stand with you come what may. There is one especially whose life would be empty – truly whose life would be over – were it not for meeting you. I cherish that moment and the good it is has brought not only me. We cannot change what we are, and what we have been through, but we can control our future. I see more and more proof of that every day. What I have seen in my past – your future – many of these things cannot now be. My lady, we will prevail.”

He gently turned her to face him, his eyes warm and focused as if he were speaking directly to her soul.

“Yes, grieve for the life you once knew, the love for a sire you once had. But do not bear your grief alone, for as long as you wish it, you are not alone. Together, my lady, we will face our future. Together.”

[ 01-22-2004 04:42 PM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Phalomir ]

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“You don’t understand,” she whispered as his dear face distorted and swam before her, moving fluidly until finally altering altogether to coalesce into a scene from another day. It was a scene encompassing misty swamps and twisted gnarltrees, fraught with animal cries and the stench of methane wafting in the air. A scene of mud and branch and leaf and stone and four images standing in all their professed love before her, while she in turn faced them with that which was stonily growing within her own heart.

Remembering.

“I- I have that same thing within me that he does, that same desire, that same evil. I too have taken the lives of others, including that of my own father...”

Unable to face him she dropped her face, and turned back to lean her forehead against the bulkhead once again.

[ 01-22-2004 05:13 PM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Graysith ]

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“I know what you have done, my lady. I have walked within your mind, as you have done in mine. I have looked into your heart, and shared with you more than you know. I have faith in what you are, my lady, and what you are not. Look into your heart, my lady, and tell me what you truly see.”

--------------------

A pause. Her head still to the bulkhead, she tried again, her voice the merest whisper.

"I- I see you there," she finally breathed, turning around to meet Phalomir's gaze, the tears in her eyes finally beginning to dry.

--------------------

...and she could bear staying silent longer. "And what may be perceived as evil to one is seen as good to another," Shayla then stated simply, her words spoken aloud but mostly meant for Graysith. "I'll never forget the first lesson you taught me...

...the one with the ty'plikk fruit marred by the blanworm. Although you killed the worm, that saved the fruit from being devoured; what was good for the ty'plikk was not good for the worm. Is it not the same when it comes to lives being lost? After all, even the Jedi...

...who claim to be the followers of Light...

...kill in the name of their cause when they deem it necessary. And though their cause may be for the benefit of the majority of the galaxy, I know there is always at least one who views even their "justified" killing as a bad and evil thing."

She paused, uncertain if anyone else was following where she was going. She certainly hoped so...

"It is no different with all of the things that you have had to do, Jharmeen," she stated then, "You have had to make choices in your life, difficult choices which most would wish to never have to make...

...and with the consideration of what would be best for the majority of those in the Universe most of the time."

She paused once more, pursing her lips and trying to get to the bottom of what she was thinking. "Things are far beyond what is good and what is evil...

...and have shifted to what is in the best interest of the Greater Good. You always taught me to simply accept things that are and go no further beyond that...

...but I do firmly believe that the clearest difference here is that you have always fought for the Greater Good of the Universe, no matter what road you had to take to get there. Aelvedaar..."

Trailing a moment, Shayla's look darkened, "...I think he's been interested in what is best for himself alone from the very beginning..."

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“Yes, and you cannot compare yourself with him. Indeed, you are better than he because you can truly allow someone into your heart. Seeing me within your heart, is there deceit? Is there an agenda? Is there manipulation? I do not see it there. There is love, caring, and goodness within you, and it shall balance that which you fear.”

“And I am there, as you are in mine, and always…”

He leaned forward and let his kiss place the finishing thoughts on his statement.

[ 01-22-2004 10:32 PM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Phalomir ]

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The unspoken retort wormed into her mind like black oil, smooth and slickly beautiful.

Did you not have an agenda once, not too long ago, one in which you—

She cut the thought in mid-track, trying to ignore it, to wish it away, to make it disappear… only to find herself utterly surprised that it was doing exactly that. Within, the Beast was rearing up in disgust, in offense that this should penetrate into its lair; with a yowl it swatted at the words, knocking them away long enough for Graysith to realize what Shayla and Phalomir had just really said to her.

She blinked, and pulled away from Phalomir, stared deeply into his eyes, then turned her gaze to Shayla. And then… she smiled as sudden realization struck home.

She may once have had an agenda… but did she follow it now? No. What had turned her from that path? What had prompted her to open herself in honesty to Shayla at last, to returning the memories to those from whom she had taken them, to now utterly dismiss her momentary lapse as…

…as a need to fill something within, something she herself had yanked from her being. Something she now found standing mere centimeters in front of her, and sitting quietly in the pilot’s seat, contemplating her in turn.

“I love you both,” she finally blurted, without really knowing that she had spoken the words, so naturally did they come from her lips.

“And I am going to need your continued strength and support if we are to defeat Lord Aelvedaar... but I want to thank you now for that which you have already given me."

Smiling, she reached up and placed a soft kiss on Lord Phalomir’s cheek; then pulled quickly away to go over and hug Shayla warmly. As if embarrassed then, she straightened quickly.

“Thank you both,” she repeated, then fell quiet, and just for the moment allowed the momentum of the circumstance to fall into other, equally as capable, hands.

--------------------

you can count on that no matter what happens and what we have to face. And for the moment, that starts with getting us where we're trying to go, despite the obstacles which have been planted in our way...

...and I do mean planted. According to our database, the star which has just exploded was once a yellow g-star which later turned into a red giant. It was never destined to go supernova, as has already been suggested...

...which means it was intentionally "blown."

Shayla paused at this, a scowl flitting across her features. "The good news in this scenario--which has also already been suggested--is that the radiation will also last a shorter time span since it was a smaller star, thus a smaller explosion. I estimate about twelve hours, rather than 3 days, before it will be safe for us to venture out of this chronotic shield."

[ 01-22-2004 11:21 PM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Shayla Stargazer Petrolu ]

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...not really. For the moment he was getting wrapped up in a favorite pasttime he was beginning to think he'd abandoned far too long...

...drinking. He tipped the brandy-bottle upwards, half-hearing what was going on, hearing things about the good, the bad, and the evil. Something like that, anyway...

But as the final contents of brandy drained from the bottle, Jasyn clearly heard Shayla's words concerning their length of stay. He couldn't say he was thrilled about it...

...but it was damned better than three days. He glanced down to the empty brandy bottle, a thought surfacing in his mind enticingly.

And it'd be especially better if...

"Hey," he blurted then, turning to Phalomir. "Speaking of checking out the storerooms...

...is there anymore where this came from?" he queried, wagging the empty bottle in the air for emphasis as a somehow hopeful look covered his face...

[ 01-22-2004 11:37 PM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Jasyn Lancaster ]

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“I do not know what supplies would be on board, but if the Dark Lady’s love for the finer things in life have transcended time as so many other of her qualities…”

A broad grin suddenly crossed his face.

“… then I shall need assistance in carrying the bottles back here.”

He took several strides towards the rear of the bridge, pausing at the hatchway.

"I trust you ladies will keep Mr. Stanza safe until we return?"

He turned his head back to Jasyn and waited, hand on the latch.

--------------------

They had THAT MUCH brandy on this ship?! This was like heaven...

Jasyn looked back to Matt, whose look was a bit warning yet at the same time permitting. He could almost read the look on his commrade's face.

Have a little, not a lot...

...and bring me some while you are at it...

A Han Solo-ish grin spread across Jasyn's face as he got to his feet and turned back to Phalomir.

"Drinks for everyone, eh?" he said then, glancing to everyone on board with that same grin still planted on his face. "Sounds like a kriffing hell of a good plan to me."

Then, his step somehow lighter and definitely excited, Jasyn followed Phalomir to the back of the ship. As they left Matt Stanza made one single statement...

...the only statement he had made in quite some time. He looked to Graysith and Shayla, a grin creeping onto his own features. "Let's just hope there's some brandy left when they get back..."

--------------------

He opened the hatch and stepped through, Jasyn on his heels.

They passed through the narrow hallway, which in the soft light seemed even more narrow than it actually was.

“Quite different from the grand halls of the Temple on K’eel Doba, eh? Now that is a fine structure. Perhaps some day I shall begin restoration of the grand Temple of the Armorers, but that is a decision for another day. The question for this moment in time is…”

He stopped at a door and grasped the latch.

“…what do we have in the storeroom?”

Grinning, Phalomir turned the latch and opened the door. It swung inward, revealing a small room loaded with boxes and crates. Phalomir scanned the writing on the sides and stepped through the door. He picked out a box and handed it to Jasyn, who struggled with the weight.

“This is sealed food and water. Twelve hours is a long time without it. I shall prepare something in the galley.”

His eyes returned to the search, reading the labels on the boxes in front. His grin turning to a look of annoyance, he began moving stacks of boxes aside to reveal more boxes behind. He searched for several moments and finally his eyes lit up.

“Ah-hah!” he exclaimed happily. “Here is what we have been looking for. I knew she would not let me down.”

He unstacked the boxes from a tall pile and put them aside. Jasyn could see only the Sith’s horns moving above the boxes he had been stacking behind.

Phalomir finally reached the case of Sith brandy which had been placed at the bottom of the original pile. As he bent down to reach for it, he felt a strange prickling on his back just as his ears caught a faint beep riding underneath the low hum of the ship’s systems. He hesitated and tried to discern the direction of the sound. It seemed to originate from a small panel in the wall.

Phalomir slid the case away from the wall and touched the panel. It slid open smoothly, and Phalomir’s eyes widened at the sight of the small device behind the panel. It was a black orb, smooth and glossy. In its center was a digital display, counting down quickly.

11… 10…

“Jasyn-- get back to the bridge!” he shouted.

Phalomir called upon his Sith magick, delving into the pool of power that had been used so often as of late. Instead of a small tapping, however, he reached completely into his abilities, letting the power flow full force from his inner being and into the forming of a dense shell of energy around the orb.

5… 4… 3…

He focused all of his will into the shell. The initial blast of the bomb strained the shell and knocked Phalomir backwards into a small stack of boxes. Phalomir sent even more of his power into containing the blast. When the shock died, he concentrated on dispersing the energy created by the blast. Finally he released the shell and fell to his knees, exhausted.

[ 01-23-2004 10:23 AM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Phalomir ]

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He didn't give them any time to ask where the goods were...

...and where Phalomir was, for that matter. Didn't give them the time to even wonder.

"Phal told me to get back here," he stated rather directly, his eyes then darkening. "And judging from the tone in his voice, something is wrong in the storeroom..."

[ 01-23-2004 11:08 PM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Jasyn Lancaster ]

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“Whatever could be wrong, Mr. Lancaster?” she asked calmly enough, cocking her head to one side. “Is Lord Phalomir having difficulties finding the brandy he is seeking?”

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He mustered enough energy to move his legs, but as he tried to stand a sharp pain stabbed through his midsection. He howled both in surprise and pain, his deafening roar sounding into the hall and to the open hatchway of the bridge.

[ 01-24-2004 03:42 PM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Phalomir ]

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She repeated Jasyn’s maneuver at the door, and skidded to a halt just inside.

Nothing. All seemed normal; box upon box stacked from bulkhead to bulkhead, from floor to ceiling, criss-crossed with pathways so one could move between the stacks. Everything seemed quiet and orderly: nothing was out of place that she could determine, nothing seemed at odds or had been knocked over.

“Phalomir?” she questioned hesitantly, then gained control of herself and took a cautious step into the room.

--------------------

... Was it worry? Concern? Or something else...

... pain...

And this would in fact coincide with the cry which had brought them all hurrying to this very room...

...but what had happened?

Not yet in the storeroom enough to fully access the situation for herself, Shayla reached out and gently laid a hand on Graysith's shoulder.

"I sense... pain..." she whispered quietly, an urgency and concern filling her voice.

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”Phalomir?” she whispered as she entered the warmth of familiar ground. ”What happened? Where are you? This store room is large…”

Even as she asked the question she nodded to Shayla and hurried on into the large storage depot, glancing quickly up one aisle and down another as she sought to home in on the Sith lord’s location.

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“My—my lady… here,” he struggled. His voice carried only for a short distance, not rising above the boxes.

He balled his hands into fists and pounded the floor. Again. The pain was still great, but the focus of the actions allowed him to gain more control over the fire within him. Again he pounded the floor, over and over until the motions became quicker and stronger and the fire began to diminish. Finally he felt his voice welling.

“Here, my lady!” he croaked. “I am here… I--”

His next words were cut short by a fire in his chest, followed by an uncontrollable cough that sent him into a fit. Though the coughing, he saw smoke drifting from his mouth.

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"Oh dear gods..." she whispered quietly, closing her eyes and stretching out a hand to lay on his sweaty brow. Even at a light touch his skin seemed to be boiling...

Shayla shuddered at this realization, her eyes still closed. Her intent had been to heal, which she could do...

...but even the healing touch of the Force wouldn't solve the root of the problem. It was as if Phalomir had swallowed up the very fires of Hell...

Shayla pressed her lips together, knowing very well what she had to do. Jedi of the ages had always been trained to absorb heat with the Force, as had she...

...and many, like Corran Horn, were highly adept in doing so. But then, even as every Force-user has a strong point...

...every Force-user also has a weakness. And heat absorption was hers; for though she could do it to a minimal efficiency, Shayla didn't know if she could do this...

...but she knew with sudden certainty that she had to try, for well did she feel the pain in Phalomir spreading out through link to Graysith, causing her to feel his pain as well. Shayla knew then she had to try...

Certain in what she must do, feeling that the Force would guide her and make her stronger in her abilities...

...for the Force tended to respond to even one's weakest abilities more readily under urgent circumstances, when adreline was flowing...

...Shayla stretched out with healing energies as she established a secure link to Phalomir. Even as she did so, great beads of sweat began to form on her forehead, but Shayla didn't back down. Squeezing her eyes shut, Shayla then reached with the Force, using it to pull the heat from Phalomir's body and into her own. Though this might temporarily wound her since heat absorption was not her strongest suite...

...Shayla did have one advantage that Phalomir might not in his injured state, and the Force was guiding her to use it. For though heat absorption was not a gift of hers...

...healing was. Even as she began to feel Phalomir's brow cool greatly, a fire began to burn deeply within her, causing sweat to begin wetting her hair. In that moment, Shayla let the link she had established with Phalomir close. In that moment, her hand fell from his forehead and her body fell limply to the storeroom floor.

And oh, the pain and the burning that seemed to engulf her...

Barely conscious, Shayla used her final efforts to reach to the Force, pulling upon Force-healing energies to bring herself into a healing trance. Even as she fell completely unconscious under the Force's healing touch, her fevered brow began to cool, evidencing that she would recover given a little bit of time...

[ 01-24-2004 08:53 PM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Shayla Stargazer Petrolu ]

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“My lady!” he shouted. “Over here!”

He glanced down at the still form of Shayla, reached out to her, but drew back. What he knew of her abilities told him to wait, and he turned and headed for the Dark Lady.

“A bomb, my lady. Hidden in this room I found a bomb. I was able to… diffuse it… well, I contained its blast. Shayla I believe healed me, and is now herself resting.”

He looked back to the end of the room where Shayla lay hidden amongst the boxes, then returned his attention to the Dark Lady.

“I believe this was a back-up plan.”

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Stopped cold.

Jerked fractionally; shook her head.

Blinked.

And finally let her stance loosen.

"I am pleased to see you are not injured, and that Shayla will heal," she said flatly. Then without any addendum or explanation she turned on her heel and left for her quarters.

[ 01-25-2004 05:50 PM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Graysith ]

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“My lady?” he called.

Not waiting for an answer, he strode into the hallway to catch up with her.

“What is it? What is wrong?”

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"Why, nothing," she said sweetly.

Then she dismissed him utterly as she whirled about and continued on her way as if she had never been approached or stopped.

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