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Topic: Lightening The Spirit
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Mara1Jade
Expanded Universe Goddess and Corran Obsessor
Member # 68
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posted 02-25-2003 10:56 PM
     
Hehehe...-------------------- Small minds think in small terms!
~~CMH, creator and writer of Shayla Petrolu, Erik Kartan, Shawn Petrolu, Terrin Danner, Jasyn Lancaster, Matt Stanza, Aaron Barnes, And Taylor Garrison~~
Posts: 972 | From: Jacksonville, FL, USA | Registered: Sep 2000 | Logged: 65.80.104.9
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Graysith
Chosen Daughter
Member # 27
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posted 02-25-2003 11:09 PM
Hey, you can't fool me....I KNOW YOU DON'T HAVE IGLOOS! You have those furhide-covered teepees.... 
((Btw... ours are denuded of fur...!))
-------------------- I ride the Stormcloud and the Night!
Posts: 3904 | From: Indianola, Iowa | Registered: Jul 2000 | Logged: 64.12.96.79
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Graysith
Chosen Daughter
Member # 27
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posted 02-26-2003 06:28 PM
OK, for those of you who like to lighten your spirits by collecting odd bits of trivia, here ya go: Butterflies taste with their feet. A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why. In 10 minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all of the world's nuclear weapons combined. On average, 100 people choke to death on ball-point pens every year. On average people fear spiders more than they do death. Ninety percent of New York City cabbies are recently arrived immigrants. Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are already married. Elephants are the only animals that can't jump. Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older. It's possible to lead a cow upstairs ... but not downstairs. Women blink nearly twice as much as men. It's physically impossible for you to lick your elbow. The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year because when it was built, engineers failed to take into account the weight of all the books that would occupy the building. A snail can sleep for three years.. No word in the English language rhymes with "MONTH." Average life span of a major league baseball: 7 pitches. Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing. SCARY!!! The electric chair was invented by a dentist. All polar bears are left-handed. In ancient Egypt, priests plucked EVERY hair from their bodies, including their eyebrows and eyelashes. An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain. TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard. "Go," is the shortest complete sentence in the English language. If Barbie were life-size, her measurements would be 39-23-33. She would stand seven feet, two inches tall. A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match. Americans on average eat 18 acres of pizza every day. Almost everyone who reads this will try to lick their elbow.... -------------------- I ride the Stormcloud and the Night!
Posts: 3904 | From: Indianola, Iowa | Registered: Jul 2000 | Logged: 152.163.188.199
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Loban
Padawan
Member # 253
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posted 02-26-2003 06:45 PM
 Spiders? *hurt arm before even reading part about everyone trying to lick elbow... I knew about that cow/stairs thing, but 35% are married?? I do disagree about one thing... that major league baseball life span is not correct... it might have been that years ago, but with the strikeouts of today... no way... -------------------- In the absence of light, darkness prevails
Posts: 1163 | From: Ardmore, OK | Registered: Jun 2002 | Logged: 65.80.161.188
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Mara1Jade
Expanded Universe Goddess and Corran Obsessor
Member # 68
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posted 02-26-2003 11:27 PM
Me? Try to lick my elbow? *looks as innocent as possible and fails*And how precisely do you choke on a ballpoint pen? Spiders... *runs and hides* -------------------- Small minds think in small terms!
~~CMH, creator and writer of Shayla Petrolu, Erik Kartan, Shawn Petrolu, Terrin Danner, Jasyn Lancaster, Matt Stanza, Aaron Barnes, And Taylor Garrison~~
Posts: 972 | From: Jacksonville, FL, USA | Registered: Sep 2000 | Logged: 65.80.104.9
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Mara1Jade
Expanded Universe Goddess and Corran Obsessor
Member # 68
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posted 02-28-2003 08:10 PM
Ahhhh pen chewing. I have seen that for sure...-------------------- Small minds think in small terms!
~~CMH, creator and writer of Shayla Petrolu, Erik Kartan, Shawn Petrolu, Terrin Danner, Jasyn Lancaster, Matt Stanza, Aaron Barnes, And Taylor Garrison~~
Posts: 972 | From: Jacksonville, FL, USA | Registered: Sep 2000 | Logged: 65.80.104.9
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Graysith
Chosen Daughter
Member # 27
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posted 03-12-2003 10:37 PM
Two Robins were sitting in a tree. "I'm really hungry," said the first one. "lets fly down and find some lunch."
They flew down to the ground and found a nice plot of newly plowed ground that was full of worms. They ate and ate till they could eat no more. "I'm so full, I don't think I can fly back up into that tree," said the first one.
"Let's just lay back here and bask in the warm sun," said the second. "O K," said the first. So they plopped down, basking in the sun. No sooner than they had fallen asleep, when a big fat tomcat up and gobbled them up.
As the cat sat washing his face after his meal, he thought…
(ready)
(You're gonna like this one)
"I just love Baskin Robins."
-------------------- I ride the Stormcloud and the Night!
Posts: 3904 | From: Indianola, Iowa | Registered: Jul 2000 | Logged: 205.188.209.6
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Mara1Jade
Expanded Universe Goddess and Corran Obsessor
Member # 68
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posted 03-25-2003 09:11 PM
Here's a good laugh:Morning Coffee -------------------- Small minds think in small terms!
~~CMH, creator and writer of Shayla Petrolu, Erik Kartan, Shawn Petrolu, Terrin Danner, Jasyn Lancaster, Matt Stanza, Aaron Barnes, And Taylor Garrison~~
Posts: 972 | From: Jacksonville, FL, USA | Registered: Sep 2000 | Logged: 66.20.157.77
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Graysith
Chosen Daughter
Member # 27
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posted 04-18-2003 12:09 AM
Ok, this one is too too funny. It's entitled, "Why Parents Have Gray Hair"
The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers.
He dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whispered, "Hello?" Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to a youngster, the boss asked, "Is your Daddy home?" "Yes," whispered the small voice. "May I talk with him?" the man asked. To the surprise of the boss, the small voice whispered, "No." Wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?" "Yes," came the answer. "May I talk with her?" Again the small voice whispered, "No." Knowing that it was not likely that a young child would be left home alone, the boss decided he would just leave a message with the person who should be there watching over the child. "Is there anyone else there in your house?" the boss asked the child. "Yes," whispered the child, "a policeman." Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the Boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?" "No, he's busy," whispered the child. "Busy doing what?" asked the boss. "Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the fireman," came the whispered answer. Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the ear piece on the phone, the boss asked, "What is that noise?" "A hello-copper," answered the whispering voice. "What is going on there?" asked the boss, now very alarmed. In an awed hushed voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper." Alarmed, concerned and more than just a little frustrated the boss asked, "What are they searching for?" Still whispering, the young voice replied, along with a muffled giggle: "Me." -------------------- I ride the Stormcloud and the Night!
Posts: 3904 | From: Indianola, Iowa | Registered: Jul 2000 | Logged: 205.188.208.166
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Mara1Jade
Expanded Universe Goddess and Corran Obsessor
Member # 68
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posted 04-27-2003 02:19 PM
Heheheh...-------------------- Small minds think in small terms!
~~CMH, creator and writer of Shayla Petrolu, Erik Kartan, Shawn Petrolu, Terrin Danner, Jasyn Lancaster, Matt Stanza, Aaron Barnes, And Taylor Garrison~~
Posts: 972 | From: Jacksonville, FL, USA | Registered: Sep 2000 | Logged: 68.154.225.141
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Dash Kelderon
On the Road to Redemption
Member # 427
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posted 05-29-2003 05:49 AM
Subject: Math
WHAT MAKES 100%
From a strictly mathematical viewpoint it goes like this: What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?
Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?
We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%.
How about achieving 103%?
Here's a little mathematical formula! that might help you answer these questions:
What makes up 100% in life? IF:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.
THEN
H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%
AND
K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%
BUT
A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4 5 = 100%
AND
B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%
AND
Look how far ass kissing will take you.
A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%
So, one can then conclude with mathematical certainty that:
while Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, And, Attitude will get you there,
Bullshit and Ass kissing will put you over the top! P.S. Sorry about the language, but the joke doesn't work with the clean version. [ 05-29-2003 11:21 AM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Graysith ] -------------------- Those 2 guys may be IDIOTS... but they think the same way I do!
Posts: 655 | From: M.I,A | Registered: Feb 2003 | Logged: 63.88.67.230
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Graysith
Chosen Daughter
Member # 27
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posted 05-29-2003 11:18 AM
I LOVE it!!! ROTFLMAO!!!And the funny thing is, it's just so true! Oh yes, FYI to everyone: I didn't edit Dash's post. I went into it to copy it so I could email it to friends, heh. [ 05-29-2003 11:27 AM: Message edited 1 time, lastly by Graysith ] -------------------- I ride the Stormcloud and the Night!
Posts: 3904 | From: Indianola, Iowa | Registered: Jul 2000 | Logged: 205.188.208.165
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